lokoike Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 Here are a few absolutely ridiculous warning labels: On a blanket from Taiwan: Not to be used as protection from a tornado. Warning on fireplace log: Caution -- Risk of Fire. A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists: Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover. Warning on an electric router made for carpenters: This product not intended for use as a dental drill. On a bottle of shampoo for dogs: Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish. On a hair dryer: Do not use in shower. On Marks & Spencer bread pudding Product will be hot after heating. On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions - open packet, eat nuts. On some frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: defrost. On a hotel provided shower cap: Fits one head. On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer: Do not eat toner. A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns: Not for highway use. Save a tree, eat a beaver. Save a tree, wipe with an owl. Every time a bell rings, a thread gets hijacked! ding, ding! Give Andavari lots of money and maybe even consider getting K a DVD-RW drive. If it's not Scottish, IT'S CRAP!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Rochip Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 On a Dumpster where I used to work: "Do Not Occupy This Dumpster" Perhaps it feared being attacked by Bush and Cheney and Rumsfeld... One post down, 500 to go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Rochip Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 These are from wackywarnings.com: A label on a baby stroller warns: ?Remove child before folding" A brass fishing lure with a three-pronged hook on the end warns: ?Harmful if swallowed" A popular scooter for children warns: "This product moves when used." A nine- by three-inch bag of air used as packing material cautions: "Do not use this product as a toy, pillow, or flotation device." A flushable toilet brush warns: "Do not use for personal hygiene." The label on an electric hand blender promoted for use in "blending, whipping, chopping and dicing," warns: "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating." A digital thermometer that can be used to take a person's temperature several different ways warns: "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally." A household iron warns users: ?Never iron clothes while they are being worn? A label on a hair dryer reads, ?Never use hair dryer while sleeping? The label on a bottle of drain cleaner warns: ?If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product.? A smoke detector warns: ?Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire.? A massage chair warns: ?DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving.? A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, ?Do not drive with sunshield in place? An ?Aim-n-Flame? fireplace lighter cautions, ?Do not use near fire, flame or sparks? A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use ?while sleeping or unconscious? A 12-inch rack for storing compact disks warns: ?Do not use as a ladder.? A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: ?May irritate eyes? A snowblower warns: ?Do not use snowthrower on roof.? A dishwasher carries this warning: ?Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher.? A box of birthday cake candles says: ?DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1984 Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 Here are a few absolutely ridiculous warning labels: On a blanket from Taiwan: Not to be used as protection from a tornado. Warning on fireplace log: Caution -- Risk of Fire. A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists: Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover. Warning on an electric router made for carpenters: This product not intended for use as a dental drill. On a bottle of shampoo for dogs: Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish. On a hair dryer: Do not use in shower. On Marks & Spencer bread pudding Product will be hot after heating. On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions - open packet, eat nuts. On some frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: defrost. On a hotel provided shower cap: Fits one head. On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer: Do not eat toner. A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns: Not for highway use. Thanks dude. That second last one saved my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oli Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 i think im going to win this Homer: I never apologise, im sorry Lisa. Thats just the way i am Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lokoike Posted February 18, 2006 Author Share Posted February 18, 2006 Holy crap guys, you are all too funny! UNKNOWN AIR CONDITIONER Caution: Avoid dropping air conditioners out of windows. UNKNOWN BLOW DRYER Warning: Do not use while sleeping. ROWENTA IRON Warning: Never iron clothes on the body. UNKNOWN VACUUM CLEANER 1. Do not use to pick up gasoline or flammable liquids 2. Do not use to pick up anything that is currently burning. UNKNOWN BATMAN CONSTUME Warning: Cape does not enable user to fly. UNKNOWN EUROPEAN CAMERA This camera will only work when film is inside. HUNGRY JACK LITE SYRUP After a lengthly instruction on how to heat the bottle: CAUTION: SYRUP BOTTLE MAY BE HOT. AMERICAN AIRLINES PEANUTS Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. TESCO'S TIRIMISU DESERT Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box). NABISCO EASY CHEESE For best results, remove cap. SWANSON TV DINNERS This product must be cooked before eating. RING POPS - Made with Real Fruit Juice Artificially Flavored. LIQUID PLUMMER Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages. Save a tree, eat a beaver. Save a tree, wipe with an owl. Every time a bell rings, a thread gets hijacked! ding, ding! Give Andavari lots of money and maybe even consider getting K a DVD-RW drive. If it's not Scottish, IT'S CRAP!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Rochip Posted February 18, 2006 Share Posted February 18, 2006 One of my favorites from TV: "For Mature Audiences Only" Usually means a lot of unneccessary swear words, gratuitous violence, an infantile plot, and actors/actresses that are obnoxious with little or no talent. I didn't mention gratuitous sex because I didn't want to get made fun of for being anti-American. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eldmannen Posted February 19, 2006 Share Posted February 19, 2006 Well, maybe they feel they need those warning labels. Because in America, people sue McDonalds for being fat, and win the case in court. People sue Starbucks for burning themselves on the coffee, and they win the case in court. And some people are really dumb and might need those warnings. I remember an article about toys which got banned. It was 3 toys which kids managed to kill themselves with. One toy, the kid put on his head and jumped from window with, asuming he would fly or something. The other toy fired missiles when press button, and the kit put it inside his nostril, he thought the rocket would go inside his nose and come out from his stomach. Then there was another toy, that a kid broke with a hammer, then ate the pieces... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Rochip Posted February 19, 2006 Share Posted February 19, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Andavari Posted February 19, 2006 Moderators Share Posted February 19, 2006 I don't remember the label completely, however watching an episode of MotorWeek I remember seeing the battery label warning on a hybrid car a Toyota or Honda that warned of being killed if the batteries were handled. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lokoike Posted February 20, 2006 Author Share Posted February 20, 2006 With friends like that, who needs enemies?! Gives a new meaning to hand-me-downs. Save a tree, eat a beaver. Save a tree, wipe with an owl. Every time a bell rings, a thread gets hijacked! ding, ding! Give Andavari lots of money and maybe even consider getting K a DVD-RW drive. If it's not Scottish, IT'S CRAP!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Rochip Posted February 22, 2006 Share Posted February 22, 2006 The Ignorance is Bliss theory as applied to malware Malware likes this theory If ignorance is bliss I should be a whole happier Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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