Hope this isn't too risque' for this forum. If it is, then please delete as you see fit.
THE RULES FOR BEDROOM GOLF
1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for
play - normally one club & two balls.
2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of
the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club
in the hole and keep the balls out of the hole.
4. For the most effective play, the club should have
a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check
shaft stiffness before play begins.
5. Course owners reserve the right to measure the length
of the club to avoid damage to the hole.
6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes
as necessary until the course owner is satisfied that
play is complete. Failure to do so may result in being
denied permission to play the course again.
7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole
immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced
player will normally take time to admire the course,
with special attention to the well formed bunkers.
8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses
they have played or are currently playing to the owner
of the course being played. Upset course owners have
been known to damage a player's equipment for this reason.
9. Players are encouraged to have proper rain gear
along, just in case.
10. Players should assure themselves that their match
has been properly scheduled. Particularly when a new
course is being played for the first time. Previous
players have been known to become irate if they discover
someone else playing what they consider to be a private
course.
11. Players should not assume that the course is in
shape for play at all times. Some players may be embarrassed
if they find the course to be temporarily under repair.
Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this
situation. More experienced players will find alternate
means of play when this is the case.
12. Players are advised to obtain the course owner's
permission before attempting to play the back nine.
13. Slow play is encouraged; However, players should
be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace at least temporarily,
at the course owner's request.
14. It is considered outstanding performance, time
permitting, to play the same hole several times in
one match.
15. The course owner will be the sole judge of who
is the best player.
16. Players are advised to think twice before considering
membership at a given course. Additional assessments
may be levied by the course owner and the rules are
subject to change. For this reason many players prefer
to continue to play several different courses.